Juggernauts Shot Out of a Cannon at 2013 Bakers Dozen

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The Juggernaut put on a clinic at the 2013 Bakers Dozen – pretty much spanking the bulk of the field and performing a wheelie on their collective faces. Results:

1st place 3-man masters: Shane, Kinger, Fang

2nd place 3-man open: Thor, Dyno, Matt “Mutha-fing” Parse

Oh yeah, and the local Hooters clientele was without two of their favorite waitresses because they were busy holding transition zone umbrellas, working on their tans, and learning about exotic food dishes like hummus.

Worth mentioning at the top of this report is the continued snake-like behavior of teammate Gorka who bailed 10.5 hours before the race start due to an imbalance of inner harmony. Team directors have banished him for 100 years and during this time he is to meditate on his shortcomings and craft bonsai trees representing the souls of each of his teammates. Team directors will judge the bonsai in the year 2113 and make a call as to his standing for the 2114 season.

HUGE rallying of Juggernaut awesomeness. Jon Rourke, momentarily off the World Cup circuit, ran the base station in true pro form, tuning, rebuilding, and entertaining the masses. The Lady Juggs provided their standard legendary support throughout the day and night. And Matt “Mutha-F’ing” Parse stepped up to scorch 7 hot laps with barely enough notice that he was racing to finish his first beer of the morning.

Dyno was extremely psyched about the team results and suggested to the bonfire party crowd that he could “chop a tree down with his junk”, so great was his pride in the Juggernaut.



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