PMBAR 2015: Fang’s Great Sacrifice

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Editors’s Note: This site is mainly comprised of plagiarism.

Bicycle racing is nothing without sacrifice and in the 2015 edition of PMBAR Thori “Fang” Wolfe set the standard in an incomparable “beau geste.” Starting the race as a support rider for the legendary El Guapo, Fang proved to be the revelation of the race. Easily the day’s most thoroughly chamois creamed rider, Fang drank several beers after midnight the night before the race, rivaling his leader El Guapo. He also had a cooler backpack than Guapo. When El Guapo destroyed his bike on the descent of the Pen de Turquie, his chances to win “King of Pisgah” appeared over. But Fang came to the rescue. While eating a Baybel cheese, Fang, who once dreamed of winning PMBAR, handed his bike to El Guapo and said “No, no, you must carry on. Win PMBAR Guapo. Bring glory to the ESF. Also, FYI, the front brakes don’t work.” He then sat on a stone fence, waiting for help to arrive and wept, knowing his own PMBAR chances were over.

And as Fang wept, the remaining four Juggernauts rode off into the wilderness for another 7 hours, each wishing that they had been wise enough to sacrifice their bike and spend the afternoon drinking beer at the HUB.

Race report: Guapo, Thor, Dyno, Gorka – two man teams, 15th and 16th places out of 75 with a little over an hour of f’ing around with broken stuff thrown in there. Respectable. This is where we went:

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IMG_6732 IMG_6766 IMG_6764 IMG_6763Don’t just eat a burrito, live it.

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One thought on “PMBAR 2015: Fang’s Great Sacrifice

  1. El Guapo debe montar. Ningún sacrificio es demasiado grande para que el guapo para hacer el gran cloruro cielos o El Guapo. Que es magnífico, tiene la fuerza de Ramsés, viste ropa cara, y acepta benevolencia.

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