During the 2016 MOCO Epic the Juggernaut ESF was momentarily detained in an elaborate sting operation by several women with fake mustaches and futuristic pistols after being lured into a wooded area with free beer. A devious yet effective method of entrapment. Feeling pleasantly buzzed yet wary of further persecution, the Juggernaut made quick work of the remaining ride and gave the MOCO trails a much deserved spanking.
The Jugg nocturnal elite strike force hosted a band of misfits for a lap around DC’s most infamous trails in honor of the departure of our homeboy Jimmy. We rode til the moon came out and drank til the neighbors complained.
The ESF started out at the Jack Rose Saloon Devils Backbone tap takeover and whiskey pairing before heading out on the bikes for a late night loop in the wilds of DC. It went extremely well and extremely poorly all at the same time.
Juggernaut founding member Jon Rourke admitted Sunday that he suffers from a rare ailment that renders his legs fish belly white. “Sometimes the sun hits my knees caps at an off angle and I see people squint. It’s a blinding effect caused by my tragically white legs,” said Rourke. It was confirmed by race officials that the disease did not play a role in his decision to race a commuter bike or to show up with a solid beer buzz.
The Juggernaut extends a warm welcome to our new teammate – El Guapo.
Hometown: Gran Salamandar de Muerte Basin
Race day diet: bison chunks
Favorite cycling item: horsehair poncho/aztec amulet
Race day soundtrack: lamentations of the women
Hobbies: prison arson, looting